Entry #8 - Dog in Jerusalem
The title could also be “I thought ulpan was going well until…” or “A little bit of knowlege is a dangerous thing.”
Our building in Neve Granot has a preschool next to it. Each morning the mothers are bringing their small children and associated bundles down the stairs by my apartment. Meanwhile, I have to get up the stairs with an old female labrador retreiver who loves children.
In Jerusalem, mothers don’t love dogs, they are terrified of them. In fact, their panicked reactions unconciously make me feel I should also watch out for something.
The lab is called “Jess,” and Jess has to press her nose against every human in greeting. Furthermore, due to the unseen world of scents, her movements are somewhat unpredictable, so I have to be ready to pull her leash, as at any moment she can veer over towards a child whose mother is holding it pressed against the wall. When this happens the mothers usually let out a little shriek and either yank the child up into the air or look like they are going to collapse… meanwhile I feel like a schmuck. Of course, pulling on the leash is a confirmation that the dog is vicious and dangerous, so the whole experience feeds on itself.
One Friday morning, the mother of a little boy and girl shocked the other mothers by greeting Jess cheerfully. She must have been from the San Fernando Valley suburbs. This was my opportunity to reach out! In spontaneous ulpan Hebrew I said, “Jess kelbah mamash tovah! Hee ochelet yeladim.”
Ahh, the difference an “L” makes!
________________________________
I had meant to pronounce “ohevet” which means “loves.” Instead I said “ochelet” which means “eats.” So… as I said it then sentence was, “Jess is a very good dog. She eats children.”
